Yeah, this poem is still a work in progrss but I really wanted to get some feedback, so if you read it leave a comment and let me know what you think please?
After she had calmed fown
From finally being able to admit to someone
How cheated she felt when they used her
I admitted to her that I was a hack
Or I suspected I might be
Like a cynic who shrugs off Tao
as if it's an obnoxious mosquito
I had given up on changing the world
And had since been using my words
To try to convince girls I'm something
That they should be interested in
When I woke up I saw the sun wasn't coming out today
But everyone, sometimes, needs to lock the door
And stare past their wall, while letting all the excess
Seep out of their naked pores, and I do understand
But if the sun wasn't going to make the effort, neither was I
So I lay flat on my back, every now and then peeking over my sheets
To see if maybe your priorities had brought you to my side of the creek
But you are older and wiser, and working with what you are given
And I knew you were the only one who could help me through this
So I keep reaching out, only to get my hands chapped and dry
But I'm trying I guess, and I keep a few extra pens in my pocket
Just in case
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